India Post News Service

NEW DELHI: What is common between Swati Chaddha (25) PR consultant, Bijoy Dass (28) entrepreneur, Ramit Singh (33) banker and Achin Aggarwaal (26) engineer? All of them are either "happily-married" twice or in the process of getting hitched, yet again.

Yes, holy matrimony is not janam janam ka saath anymore. Instead, it is about being free from any excessive emotional baggage and one's individuality being of utmost importance. Says Bengali babu Bijoy, who is "peacefully co-existing" with his Parsi "partner", "marriage is a mere social certification which holds no value if the duo is not able to feel 'married' per se."

He has been through hell while he was in wedlock. Therefore, he decided to move on to something more sensible and appealing. He got separated from his wife and is now leading a blissful time with his "partner" without having to take the sacred saath pheras in front of the society. Interestingly, these people belong to a culture that is famous for its "till death do us apart" ideology. Marriage does not arrive with a together-forever tag anymore.

The young lot is prepared to move from one relation to another- be it outside matrimony or within it- rather than working to save a dysfunctional one. Time has always been of utmost importance for these I-me attitude carrying people and thus frustration levels are high and tolerance level zilch. Reveals Swati, "Most of my family members were shocked to hear my wanting to break a 5-month long marriage".

Women, with their financial independence now can afford to take a stand in a relationship that is nothing but dead. Unlike yesteryears when people went through thick and thin in all possible situations with their "better-half", today's generation wants to have their own space.

Shobhaa De in her book Spouse: The Truth About Marriage argues that the dynamics of modern day marriages have been changed mainly because women have stepped out of the domestic sphere and therefore are in a position to question the old chauvinist order.

Both Ramit and Achin have been dodging commitment for a long time for a simple reason- fear of having someone with them 24 x 7. Added responsibility is another factor which keeps them in a "no-strings attached" relationship.

Nowadays all is acceptable- speed dating singletons, secondshaadi.com, HIV couple matches through NGOs, cocktail parties etc. Online matrimonial sites are also pretty popular as they let people be more fluid about caste and language issues.

Who would have thought a decade back that Indians will make such extensive use of the worldwide web to enter holy matrimony! Such transitions have altered our way of looking at the institution of marriage and relationships. At times good and at times bad, but nevertheless these new societal barometers are here to stay.