The Katöhopanisad presents the na-ture of the choice available to a hu-man being in the two words, sreyas and preyas. It looks as though these two ends, sreyas and preyas, are open to a human being. This is like having to decide which road to take when you are at a crossroad in a new place and you have a destination in view.

Once in India, another Swami and I were driving with a few others to some place. We reached a point where the road bifurcated. We had to reach our destination at noon to attend a meeting. The Swami instructed the driver, ‘Go this way,’ and the driver took that road.

The driver did not know the route. The choice was made because the road was very nice, newly laid and completely empty. We drove about 50 miles and when we found no sign of any milestone, we stopped the car. We consulted someone who said, ‘You have to go back 50 miles!’ Since we did not want to go back, we asked ‘Is there any other way?’

He said ‘Yes, there is; but you have to drive an additional 50 miles‘. We chose that route because we did not want to accept defeat and ended up at our destination at 6 pm instead of at noon! We missed our lunch and went late to the meeting.

All this happened because the road looked good. This is preyas. The whole basis of choice was the appearances of the roads; one road, the preyas road, seemed to be good and the other, the sreyas road, did not seem to be impressive. The preyas road looked very beautiful, was lined with flowers, and seemed very inviting, very welcoming and very enticing.

The sreyas road did not look inviting or welcoming; it seemed to be forlorn and less traveled. When one has to choose, one needs to have a basis for the choice. One does not choose something just because it is good looking or enticing. What is the basis of one’s choice? A viveki is a person who discerns, who is able to sift and see what is worthwhile, who is serious and who wants to do something which is meaningful.

Such a person chooses sreyas. One wants yoga because one has to achieve something. Then after achieving it, one has to retain it. Or, one wants to get rid of things that one had acquired because they are no longer desirable. With great avidity you go in for something. After getting that something, it is all over.

After a few days you grow out of the new hobby, or you get tired of it, and you want something else. The problem is not in what you are doing. There is nothing wrong with what you are doing. The problem is ‘I’ am not at home with ‘myself’. When I am not at home with myself, anything I do becomes monotonous after some time, because I am monotonous myself. I have a self-monotony. I cannot handle myself. Even after starting this new hobby, I am still the same.

After getting rid of the hobby, also, I will remain the same. What is the use? I am the same no matter what I do. First, I get rid of a relationship; I am the same. Then, I need a relationship and therefore, I go back to the same person. Then again I have the same problem and this continues. One girl said to me, ‘Swamiji, I get easily tired of whatever I do. Therefore, I am afraid of getting married, because I might get tired of it’.

The problem is not what one does; it has nothing to do with things. This is viveka, discerning that behind this there is some other problem. It has something to do with oneself. One cannot stand oneself, and one has to face oneself, always. Thus, one becomes a constant murmurer. Therefore the problem does not lie with anything external, but with oneself because oneself is the problem.

The mind is never a problem; it is just an instrument, a means. I am the person who has to be fixed up. I have a self-view which is not acceptable to me. Such a self-view is the cause of the tiredness and the self-loathing. The problem of self-esteem and self-image is ‘I’ centered.