U.G. doesn’t know who or what he is or what effect he is having on others, nor even if he is enlightened. He says if you are enlightened, you can’t know it.
I think I am beginning to understand his desire to demonstrate to the world, or to whoever is interested, that what happened to him, his return to the natural state has no religious content at all, has nothing to do with holiness or holy men, or the great vastness, or anything. It is just his body functioning in its perfect, unique way, doing what comes naturally to it.
This is a major message, as most people are so obsessed with becoming, self-improvement, seeking salvation and the like, always with the assumption that there is something wrong.
U.G. says there is nothing wrong except our idea that something is wrong. On the other hand, he says the world, or at least human life is probably doomed, that its annihilation is practically assured. But that the process might be slowed down by the recognition of mutual terror, that killing one’s neighbor is killing oneself.
This might seem to imply that there is something wrong, but to the contrary, there is no way for us to know what Nature intends. The human mind may be in itself, in its very evolution towards inappropriate usage, a self-destruct mechanism reflecting the larger picture that what is born must die. Including, ultimately, a species.
I experience U.G., as most people do once you get past his rejecting, negative first impression to seekers, as compassionate and loving, yet impersonal.
He would slash out those adjectives, but then I would be left with the realization that there are no words to describe this man adequately. The words are only pointers to what he is, to his impact.
Terry described him as a Colossus and that sounds about right. Whatever it is, it is immense and volcanic and silent and Plutonic, destructive and tender and delicate – he is a beautiful man with no pretenses or affectations.
His speech and repetition of stories and metaphors are the manifestations of his energy, his way of responding to the stimulus of human life.
He gives endlessly of himself and it is touching yet overwhelming to be around him. I feel fortunate indeed and thank God my neurosis didn’t keep me from making the moves I did to be with him, like offering my apartment, coming out here.
Moorty also mentioned in the car that the very quality that U.G. emphasizes about you is the quality that will become unraveled, and in my case it is perhaps his saying over and over again, “She’s so efficient….”
U.G. called at 7:30 yesterday morning. I was in the shower and when I called him back right after, he apologized for disturbing me! These manners are so impeccable and simplicity so striking in a man with such fire and power.
I taped some good conversations between U.G. and Terry on sex and Bob and U.G. on J. Krishnamurti, on the mind and why we have it if it is against nature. U.G. says it is perhaps part of nature’s self-destruct, realigning principal.
In the afternoon Douglas, who was with U.G. in Switzerland when he had his Calamity in 1967, began describing this time from memory. How he had been with U.G. when he went to hear the J. Krishnamurti lecture in Saanan that seemed to set things off, U.G.’s realization that he was already in the state J.K. was describing.
How Valentine thought U.G. was dying and called Douglas, panicked, and how Douglas went into U.G.’s room and found him rigid, bent like a bow, but past the point of dying. He said the siddhi, the spiritual power in the room, was so intense it nearly knocked him over.
Excerpted from ‘Travels with UG.’ The 95th birth anniversary of U.G. will be observed on July 9
Julie Thayer
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