Chuck Hillig

Chuck Hillig copyJust because everything is perfect, that doesn’t mean that things don’t appear to change. Who you really are, of course, doesn’t (and can’t) ever change. Who you think you are, however (as well as who you think you are not) appears to change a lot. But life always unfolds from one perfect instant into yet another perfect instant …and, amazingly, every micro-instant in between is also absolutely perfect, too.

You can realize this for yourself the very moment that you give up your belief about what perfection is ‘supposed’ to look like. You see, without your idea about what’s perfect, then perfection always looks exactly like ‘what is.’

However, whenever you superimpose what you believe ‘should be’ over what actually ‘is,’ the misalignment creates both the tension and the friction that feed into your persistent illusion of separation.

Since happiness and bliss are your own true nature, however, there’s no reason to go out searching for something that you already have (and are.) Please remember, though, that just because every moment is always perfect, that doesn’t imply that every moment is always going to be comfortable.

The body’s ongoing search to seek pleasure and avoid pain will automatically play out as it does. But that still doesn’t mean that whatever shows up for you is going to be any more perfect than what’s present right here and right now. Life is as it is because, at this single moment of now, it simply can’t be any other way.

Relationship problems
Our closest relationships can be either a golden chalice or an iron cauldron. We’re all cooked in the melodramas of our own making until we become softer and more malleable. Marriage is an opportunity to deepen our compassion, love and forgiveness. Since our spouse is a reflection of who we are, the guru is really appearing to us as the Beloved.

In our neurotic need to dominate and control, though, (all fear-based), we often don’t appreciate the gifts that our significant relationships bring to us. We should learn to deeply honor and respect their contribution to our own unfoldment.

Your spouse is the way that they are because of the way that you are. And, just like it was in school, you’re not always going to like what you’re being taught. Remember, though, that none of it (no matter how crazy it might be) is happening to you. It’s all actually happening for you.

By the way, therapy is not about feeling ‘better.’ Therapy is about telling the truth. It’s about ‘feeling-whatever-you’re-feeling’ and finding the courage to ‘be-who-you-already-are.’ Bottom line: A good therapist helps you to grow up and to create better dreams. A satguru, however, helps you to wake up and to stop dreaming altogether.

Telling a story
The only Truth (capital ‘T’) that’s really real is Absolute truth, and it’ll never change into anything else simply because it can’t change. It just ‘is-what-is.’ Absolute truth manifests as relative truth within the Great Illusion, however, whenever we start telling a story about ‘what is.’ Relative truth depends on remembering a past or imagining a future. It only shows up within the dualistic world of opposites, stratifications, values (e.g. ethics) and, of course the five senses.

Specifically, relative truth arises when there’s a point of view (i.e. an ‘Observer’ observing an ‘Observed’). Absolute truth, on the other hand, doesn’t have a polar opposite simply because it’s incapable of adopting a single point of view about anything. Or, more accurately, you might say that Absolute truth holds all possible points of view because, at the bottom line, Absolute truth is just ‘what’s so.’

Clients are able to heal in therapy when they find the courage to fully embrace Absolute truth.
Based on an interview by Dick de Boom on website Amigo. Chuck Hillig is a practicing Marriage and Family Therapist in Ojai, California.

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